Balance: Scheduling your time in Ramadan

Mum Loves Me is an excellent Canadian website with lots of resources for parents including online seminars and discussions.

With Ramadaan only days away, they published this article:

Scheduling your time in Ramadan

During Ramadan the demands on your time are increased. Between chores, family, kids, and cooking, your time can easily get mismanaged. In some parts of the world the days of fasting are extremely long. For a mother who is fasting it is easy to end up feeling drained and exhausted if you do not put in place a proper schedule. If there is one time of the year you should have a schedule for it’s for the month of Ramadan. Having a schedule insures that you will not miss out on the blessings of this month. Obviously being a mother and having such responsibilities does not allow you to do everything you want to do during Ramadan but setting priorities and striving hard will make a difference.

In Ramadan, everyone is always making the extra effort to do something, whether it is waking up for tahajjud everyday, going for taraweeh regularly even though they have work the next morning, finding the extra time to read Quran and the list goes on. While you may not able to do some of the things listed you need to look at yourself as an individual and see what is your capacity and how much effort you are able to put forth in striving to worship Allah. So you might wake up earlier than usual, stay up later than usual, shift some duties around, whatever it is that works for you, you need to put in that extra effort. Not everyone achieves the same goals during Ramadan, but one thing for sure is that everyone is doing more than they usually would on a regular basis outside Ramadan.

You should also take advantage of the acts of worship that are easily forgotten. Spend the time you are preparing dinner in dhikr to Allah (swt). Play Quran while you fold the laundry and recite a long. Prepare a little extra food and give it to a family that is not as well off. Teach your children about the blessings of Ramadan. Discuss a hadith a day as a family and strive to implement it together. Work on manners and lead by example. There is reward to be found in almost everything we do each day. Even if you are not able to do what you did before having children find comfort in the acts of worship that we usually deem as “small”. For small and consistent adds up quickly.

Taking this into consideration, you must plan out a tentative schedule for yourself which involves all aspects that affect you daily. Once you put things into perspective, then only will you be able work towards your goals which you have set up for Ramadan. It’s easy to feel that spiritual disconnect when you have other duties to attend to and children to look after. But remember, that if you did something consistently and are unable to do due to a particular reason, then you are still rewarded for the deed as if you are still doing it. Isn’t that just awesome?! So remember it’s not necessarily about how much you can do, but how much you are striving to do to maximize on the rewards of this blessed month.

The question now is: How will you schedule your time?

Source: Mum Loves Me

Social – Hectic being a mother & wife in Ramadaan!

Q. I am a Muslim mother of 5 children aged between 2  & 15 years. Ordinarily it is a hectic task to tend to their upbringing and ensure that all their needs are looked after including my husband.

In Ramadaan the pressure heightens to such a degree that I sometimes wonder whether I will cope. At times it becomes very difficult to exert oneself in ibadah and also to perform the 20 rakaats taraweeh at night. Every mum like me will know what I am talking about. However, I do it for my family and the pleasure of Allah. I feel as women we miss out on many of the benefits of Ramadan due to our household chores. Please advise me on how I could spend Ramadaan in a way that I will be achieve the objectives of Ramadaan with fulfilling my household duties. I am very grateful .

A. Your zeal to acquire the best out of Ramadan is in itself a great bounty for which you should be grateful to Allah. The hadith states that the intention of a believer is better than his/her action. Indeed the reward for a woman who strives to give her family the best attention and upbringing is immense. Your striving in tending to the household chores and giving your children and husband attention is in itself a form of ibadah for which you will be duly rewarded.

In Ramadaan though one should utilize one’s time more effectively by planning and good management. Of course the daily routine work will always continue and they can be no end to the cooking, baking and washing that forms part of this cycle, however, clever planning of one’s day and night will enable one to draw the maximum from it. Set yourself realistic targets as to how much of tilawat, zikr and other nafl ibadat you would like to accomplish and draw up a timetable and then stick to it. If you happen to slip don’t be deterred and continue with your timetable. Insha Allah a great deal can be achieved if this method is employed.  In another hadith we learn that the most beloved of actions to Allah are those that are done constantly though they maybe few. So be balanced and moderate in your ibadah but strive for sincerity and steadfastness.

Ensure that your good time is not consumed in idle talk, be it by phone or otherwise, and avoid frequenting places like malls, restaurants, etc. A lot of valuable time is lost in such places. Keep communication to the bare minimum and cut out any unnecessary outdoor activity.

Furthermore, whilst engaged in your chores keep your tongue moist with zikr of Allah and recite the Tasbeeh Fatimi after every Fardh salaah. This is an effortless exercise which will keep you in the remembrance and consciousness of Allah all the time. May Allah grant you strength and fortitude in this blessed month.

May Allah grant one and all a beneficial and spiritually prosperous Ramadaan. Aameen.

THURSDAY, 20 AUGUST 2009 11:46

Source: DarulIhsan.com